Dear Anna,
I've had a standing weekday date with a guy for the past eight weeks. The first three dates were casual drinks and the last five were dinner, then back to his place. Everything seems great-great food, sex and conversation-but I'm starting to get the booty-call vibe from him. We chat sporadically during the week via text, but nothing of particular substance. There hasn't really been a mention of feelings or wanting to see each other more. I tried to approach the subject and he commented on our incompatible schedules. There's also an eight-year age gap between us. Is the age difference playing a factor here, or am I turning into a high-priced booty call? -Anon.
Dear Anon.,
I don't know if I'd go so far as to label it a "booty call" arrangement, but it does seem hella casual and as if he has no big desire to change that dynamic. Unless he's an on-call doctor or a really important drug dealer, "incompatible schedules" is basically another way of saying "I'm dating other people and don't have time to bone you with more regularity." Soooo, the real question is: Do you want the dynamic to change? If you're not too keen on the once-a-week-sex-with-no-commitments thang, it might be time to move on to greener pastures. If, however, you're fine with it being mostly casual but don't want to feel like just a booty call, make an occasional date with him that won't turn sexy, e.g. a lunch date or a "Roseanne" marathon. If he balks at the idea of spending time with you in a setting that won't lead to Bonerville, then consider yourself booty-called and hang up.
Dear Anna,
How do I convince my boyfriend that my bisexuality is real, even though I'm dating a man? -Frustrated
Dear Frustrated,
Break up with him. Start dating his sister, mom and all of his female friends. Document your adventures with these ladies and post the most scintillating pictures and video footage to your social media networks, making sure to tag him with the caption, "Who's real now, bee-otch?!"
If that's too much effort, then just break up with him. People who think that bisexuality is not a real sexual orientation or that bisexuals in monogamous relationships magically lose their identities or pasts don't deserve to get laid with any kind of consistency. Date someone who accepts you for who you are, no questions asked-and, more importantly, no accusations.
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