"So, are you going to go?"
I have heard this question more times in the past month than I ever expected. You see, my 10-year high school reunion is coming up. My friends are wondering if they should attend, figuring that if enough people they still talk to are going, it won't be awkward.
Some of the people I've spoken to are all in on the idea. Some have responded with words I can't get away with printing here. As for everyone else, we're all operating in a state of blah about the whole thing. (Side question: What is it about us Chicagoans that we like to wait until the ABSOLUTE LAST MOMENT to commit to plans like you have so much else going on in your life. It's annoying.)
I think I figured out why there is so much ambivalence: Facebook burnout. Even with a graduating class of 400-plus, I can tell you what a decent number of my classmates are doing with their lives. Well, ____________ just had a baby in between posts about how men ain't worth nothin', and ____________ has a new cool job in Seattle that makes me super jealous and kinda angry even though we haven't talked since Gore lost in 2000. Add that to the fact that I manage to run into someone I went to school with every weekend at the bar and you can see why a lot of us are on the fence.
This isn't just limited to Homewood-Flossmoor High School's Class of 2003. I've heard people from other parts of my life speak about their past lives in tones that border on homicidal. What are we all scared of?
There are exceptions, of course, but a lot of times it can seem that people straight up don't like the person they used to be. If you used to be a Nazi drug-dealing pedophile (a stretch, but I just tried to come up with the absolute worst person I could think of off the top of my head) then by all means, embrace change. My guess is that you just had a bout of low self-esteem that you either conquered or got down to a manageable level. That's OK!
Were you dirt poor growing up? Bet you know how to make a dollar out of fifteen cents! Don't have it all together yet? Here's the best part: No one does! Is it a fear of not seeming successful enough? Ask yourself: Who are you worried about impressing? The people who care don't matter and the others will love you anyway.
As for my reunion? I figure I'll go, have some drinks, talk smack about who got ugly and probably hear Usher's "Yeah" like 40 times.
I'll say to the rest of you: Don't be scared to love that you were who you were and the situations you used to be in. For better or for worse, they got you to where you are today. Go Vikings!
Ernest Wilkins is Chicago's wingman. erwilkins@tribune.com
Want more? Discuss this article and others on RedEye's Facebook page.